So my afternoon babysitter hasn't been quite as available as I'd hoped, thus leaving me very little time during the day to tackle those last few projects I had planned to get to before the baby comes. No worries - they're not urgent...but you know me. If they're on my list, I want them done!
A few days ago, I woke up from my nap - and contemplated the 4 or 5 things I wanted to try and accomplish in the 30-45 minutes I had before Deirdre woke up. Everything seemed super important...and although I wasn't stressed about accomplishing any of them, I was stumped as to which one or two I should tackle first.
Do I pick something that can be started and completed, but isn't a priority?
Do I opt for a task that's been on the list for way too long?
Do I do something that could be done while Deirdre's awake, but is such a priority that I should do it now?
Or do I tackle a large project, just so I make some headway on it?
These are the things I was considering as I lay in bed, taking just 5 minutes or so to choose my plan of attack. Of course, my mind also considered the fact that it's a bit of a raw deal that I have to choose in the first place. I found myself irked with the reality that I had just spent 2 hours sleeping, when I could have crossed almost all of those things off my list if I hadn't taken a nap. (Of course - that's not true...I probably could have completed about 3 of them...but when you're throwing a mini-pity party for yourself, rational thinking isn't normally allowed.)
So I felt sorry for myself for another minute or so, frustrated that my lupus fatigue can be so demanding, and then I wised up. I realized that although I nap, which forces me to prioritize and choose only a short list of things to accomplish in the limited time I have left, the fact that I take time to recharge and re-energize allows me to have a choice in the first place. If I didn't nap, I would be a royal mess. Maybe not the very first day...but by the second and the third, my joints would be aching, I'd probably see some swelling, and then where would I be? I wouldn't have any options at all - I wouldn't be able to choose this task over that one, because I wouldn't be capable of tackling any of them in the first place.
Having reminded myself that I'm actually creating opportunities, rather than squashing them, I returned to my mental list of things to do, gladly choosing the highest-priority item to tackle.
Of course - within a minute of my epiphany, I heard Miss Deirdre calling from her room, awake and ready to tackle the afternoon. Oh well - my great list of to-do's would have to wait. Deirdre was waiting for me to come read books with her...something I would gladly choose to do any day of the week!